If you’ve ever been to a large church, then you know the drill. It’s easy to go in and leave without being noticed (for the most part). For some, that’s the reason they attend large churches–they can be completely anonymous and without accountability to anyone. But for many, they would like to get plugged in, but they don’t just know where to begin.

This is something I worried about for myself, actually, as I started pastoring at Pioneer Memorial Church–would it ever get to a point where I actually became familiar with people?The church is not on the massive scale of things, but we do average about 2,700 between two services, so it would normally make familiarity with people relatively difficult. Here’s some lessons I’ve learned in the last few months about feeling connected.

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Perspective changes everything, doesn’t it?

Sometimes all that’s needed is to look at an idea from the perspective of someone else, or to actually hear the perspective of the other person, to help us see that we might be a little off-base.

On this blog we’ve covered topics of assimilation and how to treat first time guests. Occasionally we get some comments from people that have been guests at churches and have been treated badly. There’s nothing like reading something like that to make me re-evaluate my priorities.

Well, my friend Jonathan Peinado, a pastor, recently sent me a poem that a first-time guest wrote and sent to him after being treated badly for wearing a hat in church. I think it provides some powerful lessons. Check it out:

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I was recently in Starbucks (it was decaf people) and couldn’t help be struck by the following landing page when you log onto the wifi there. Check it out:

I noticed a couple of things:

1. They were expecting me

2. They were inviting me to stay and be comfortable

3. They were inviting me to return

I suppose if churches were as intentional in doing even little things as Starbucks is on their landing page, perhaps many would have a different perception of churches.

Maybe. Maybe not. Thoughts?

Does your church do potlucks? I know many churches no longer do these. In case you don’t know what this is, it’s just some kind of lunch that’s offered after the service is over.

At my church we used to do these every week. We thought that it was a great opportunity for people to connect with each other and touch base with guests that have come. To a certain degree, this was the case. A few months ago we made the decision to just have a joint potluck just once a month. To be honest, this was mainly a financial and human resources issue. Doing a big potluck every week requires quite a few volunteers and a lot of cleanup, so we decided to do something else for the other weeks. Outside of the church doors we set up some tables with drinks, muffins, cookies, and that sort of thing.

And guess what we noticed? We noticed that people were actually interacting a lot more then they were in the potlucks. In a potluck, people typically sit with the same people, in the same areas. If they do sit with a guest, they have the ability to connect with 3-4 people, perhaps. Notice the fatal flaw here? It’s all the sitting that’s happening.

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Easter is just a few days away. So here’s the question: will you be ready to receive guests that want to come?

I recently read a fascinating report by Bob Franquiz called  How To Think Like an Unchurched Person. You can download the pdf by clicking on that link. In the document he details his experience of what it was like being a first-time guest at a synagogue.

And the following are four pieces of information that an unchurched person will be looking for on your church website before they come:

1. Service Times. This probably sounds like a no-brainer, but many don’t have that info on their website. Someone should be able to find your service times quickly and without too much hassle. Do you have two service times? Do you start at 10:30am? Do you start at 11:30am? List the times.

2. Directions. Not only should you have the full address listed clearly, but you should also have a link where they can receive turn-by-turn direction through a google map. It’s quite easy these days to insert the Google map of your church address onto your website. For more info on how to do that click here. You should also include clear signage on the inside of your church to help them get around to where they need to go. There’s nothing worse than walking into a new place and having that lost feeling.

3. Service Length. You may list your service times on your website, but do you list how long the service actually lasts? People want to know if they’re going to be sitting there. If you don’t list the times, people may assume the service is three hours long. So share if it’s a 60, 75, or 90 minute service.

4. Dress Code. This is important. What’s the personality of your church like? Do people mostly dress in suits there? Do they mostly dress in jeans and shorts? If it is a more laid back atmosphere, but they come in a suit, they’ll feel quite out of place.

So how are you doing with those? This definitely made me do a double check on our church website. And I found things that I could tweak to make more clear. So if you found anything you need to change, jump on it now. Be ready to receive guests in your church this Easter weekend. So what do you need to add or change?

[image by guarsan]

In this post, entitled “One of the Best Ways To Learn Leadership,” I wrote about the principle of taking leaders you admire and want to learn from out to lunch on a regular basis. Today I had a question about what kind of questions I usually ask during those meeting times. Thanks Chris Jones for asking me about this.

Here are some of the top questions I ask:

1. What do you do for evangelism? What’s your evangelism strategy? Some churches go really big on Easter, Christmas, and usually a few other days in the year. I want to know about that. One pastor I spoke to has had great success in doing a big outreach during Mother’s Day.


2. What do you do for assimilation? How do you treat and respond to first time guests? Some churches send out cards, some call the people, some bake bread and deliver it. I try to understand how they contextualize this process for their area and people they’re trying to reach.


3. How do you get people involved in ministry? What process do they have to go through?
In some churches you have a chance to be involved in ministry once a year during a nominating committee process. In other churches they encourage you to be involved the very next week. I want to know what kind of metric they have in place for people to be involved in leading a team or just joining a team. 


4. What is the organizational structure of your church like? How are decisions made in your church? The second question will reveal most of what you need to know. Either decisions are made through some kind of boards or committees or they’re made by the pastor and his staff, or maybe just the pastor. I want to know if they have teams of elders and deacons and how they function and what their purpose is.


5. Do you do small groups? What’s your small group philosophy?
I want to know if they use affinity groups or cell groups? Are the semester-based or do they meet through the whole year? Do they meet in homes or at the church? How effective have they been?


6. Do you have a stewardship system in place?
What do they do to facilitate giving in the church? Do they do online giving? What do they use for that? How many are giving online?


7. Do you have a discipleship system in place? What’s your strategy for helping the people to become spiritually mature?

Those are some of the main questions I ask about. In short, I just try to be really curious and have an open mind that’s ready to learn. To read the post I reference click here.

What about you? What questions would you add to the list to ask a leader if you had one hour with them?


[image by amanki]